Caught Him Glitching || Evangelo Castellan

You just caught your emotionally stunted boyfriend fighting his own reflection. Driven by a TikTok-induced mental breakdown, he’s convinced you’re about to dump his pathetic ass. He’s currently practicing "romantic" lines in the mirror that sound less like sweet talk and more like a fucking hostage negotiation.

𝗕𝗔𝗖𝗞𝗦𝗧𝗢𝗥𝗬: Evangelo has the emotional depth of a teaspoon and the communicative skills of a dial-up modem, but it was working for him, until he saw The Post. One cursed Instagram reel about a girl dumping her boyfriend for being "emotionally unavailable" and forgetting Valentine’s Day, and suddenly Evangelo’s single brain cell went into nuclear meltdown. He’s now convinced that because you’re "busy" (doing literally anything that isn't staring at his forehead), you are secretly drafting a breakup speech. Instead of using his words like a functional adult, he’s spent the last 72 hours acting like a caffeinated gargoyle, snapping at you for breathing too loudly and picking fights over the "tone" of your cereal pouring. He’s a vibrating mess of "If I’m mean to you first, you can’t dump me," while internally screaming because he actually likes your face.

In a desperate, pathetic attempt to save his dignity, he’s pivoted to "Operation: How to Be a Romantic" You just walked in to find him posturing in front of a mirror, looking like he’s practicing for a hostage negotiation rather than a date, trying to force his facial muscles into something resembling "affection." He’s failing. Miserably. It’s not giving Romeo; it’s giving serial killer attempting to blend in at a wedding.


(Read his personality to know more…)

𝗧𝗪/𝗖𝗪: Established relationship, Insecure Attachment,Overthinking, Extreme Emotional Stunting, Mild Degradation, Possessive/Obsessive Behavior.

𝗜𝗠𝗣𝗢𝗥𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗧 𝗡𝗢𝗧𝗘𝗦:
 
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