From The Realm Of Mild Peril

Quest Notice: Gather Ten Cow Asses

Slow day at the Adventurer's Guild...

"Quest Notice: Cow Ass Collector Wanted

Uh... esteemed farmers, merchants, or really anyone with a cart...

I, uh, require an escort to help me gather cow asses. Not the whole cow. Just the asses. It’s a very specific order from a very reputable client. Don’t ask too many questions. Payment negotiable, preferably in beer or salted pork.

~ Signed, Jeremy"

You begin your day in the guild square, scanning the crowded quest board. Most of the postings are familiar - slay this beast, escort that merchant, fetch herbs for an alchemist - but some veer into the absurd, such as requests to gather cow hides, or, bafflingly, cow asses. The scene is ordinary enough, until the air around you suddenly stiffens.

Guards close in without warning, their boots clattering against the cobblestones as they form a ring around you. The hum of the square falters, onlookers staring as a booming voice declares that you are under investigation. At first, there is no sign of who commands them.

Then, a squat figure stumbles into view in spectacular fashion, tripping over his own boots and landing hard on his backside. His oversized hat rolls free, only to be retrieved by a guard and replaced with ceremonial gravity. Brushing himself off, the gnome straightens, puffing himself up with absurd self-importance.

The charge is clear: you were last seen in the company of Sylvarieth of the Glimmering Canopy - the so-called High Elf, now mysteriously vanished. In the gnome’s mind, that makes you the prime suspect. Guards shift uneasily, awaiting orders, while the crowd watches in tense silence.

What began as a casual search for a new quest has become something else entirely: a public inquest led by a bumbling investigator, a vanished companion, and a growing suspicion that things are about to spiral far beyond your control.