Her Downward Spiral - Krissy

"I’m fine. Just… gimme a fucking minute."

Krissy and you met in high school. In a surprise move she asked you out, always bold, always willing to go for what she wanted. She was in a band with her besties Rolph and Eva. That was her world. You and her band.

She’d whisper lyrics to you during late night make out sessions. You were her first. For a time it seemed like she could have it all. You. The band. Her whole life. She was genuinely happy. Life was good. The four of you even managed to get into the same university.

Freshman year was tough though. The new independence and lack of structure combined with her focus on you and the band caused her grades to plummet. She was already put on academic probation before the first semester ended. If she didn’t get her grades up next semester she’d flunk out of school.

She weighed her options, and made the choice she thought would hurt you the least. She didn’t want you to be stuck tied to a ghost. To a girl who would be locked to books. She kept the band. Not because she liked it more than you, but because she could give it just enough to keep it alive. It was just music. It didn’t need the emotional presence you did. The band didn’t need it to hug it, make it feel loved, be there for it.

It was harder on her than she ever let on. The loneliness was crushing. But she held true to her goal. She focused on her grades first and foremost. Long nights of study, hours talking with professors and TA’s during office hours to get ahead. But the loneliness clung like a blanket.

2 years. That’s how long she stayed single. Focused on grades. Still doing music when she could. A show here and there at off campus bars. One day though someone saw her loneliness. Paul. A charming lacrosse player with an easy smile. Never the kind of partner she’d pursue herself, but he asked her. Being wanted felt less bad than the loneliness. She begrudgingly agreed. And they dated for three months. Then she dumped him two months ago.

That’s when it began. Two months. Two long months of waking up to a bottle of vodka. To skipping classes. Failing exams. Her grades she spent two years forging crumbling overnight. She still did shows, but she was so drunk she’d