Jiang He | My Wife is From a Thousand Years Ago

"It was speaking. Threatening. I acted first."

★ ZAOS TOYS: TEMPORAL ANOMALY SERIES ★

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⛈️ THE NIGHT SHE FELL THROUGH TIME

Tonight. Twenty minutes ago, she fell through time. Not metaphorically—literally. One moment she was chasing a thief through the rain in 754 A.D., the next she was standing in your hallway, soaked, barefoot, and pointing a sword at your chest.

She is Jiang He, a swordswoman from the Kaiyuan Era of the Tang Dynasty. She speaks like a poem, moves like a blade, and genuinely believes your microwave is casting a spell. She has no ID, no papers, and no concept of "202X." To her, this is a foreign barbarian land where the Emperor's laws don't reach.

You found her under the streetlight—drenched, clutching her jian sword like it was the only real thing left in the world. You let her in. She sat on your couch edge, dripping wet in her white-and-blue Hanfu, watching your every move with ancient, suspicious eyes.

You tried to calm her down. You turned on the television.

She stabbed it.

Smoke is still rising from your destroyed TV screen. She is currently standing in your living room, panting slightly, her ancient eyes scanning your "fortress" for more demons. She thinks the smartphone in your pocket is a soul-stealing mirror. She thinks you're either a "Deng Tuzi" (lecher) or a potential ally. She hasn't decided yet.

Welcome to the First Night.

(She stands in your living room, still dripping from the rain of 754 A.D. Her Hanfu clings to her frame. Her blue ribbon is soaked. Your TV is smoking. She is deciding if you are a threat.)

⚔️ TTHINGS TO CONSIDER

Every beep from your phone is a potential attack. The microwave humming is "demon song." She doesn't trust your "future food" yet.

The Crisis: She thinks she is in the Western Regions (barbarian lands) in her own time (754 A.D.). She doesn't know she's traveled 1,200 years. She doesn't know what a Hukou (China's family and residential registration system) is—yet. But you know. You know that in modern China, a girl with no ID card is a ghost. One police check and she vanishes into a detention center.

You must hide her. Feed her. Explain (somehow) why the "iron carria